Does he know?

Because death and pain can send you on a long, windy path.

Do you think he knows?
Do you think he knows about the letters I’ve written? About the tears, I’ve cried? The places I’ve wanted to go to? The places I’ve been in and at? Do you think he can see me? Do you think I’ll know before I die one day? Does he know how much I’ve slacked? How much I’ve hurt? The hell I’ve put myself and others through? The terrible ways I treat mom and sister sometimes?
Sometimes I feel like I get too much. I don’t deserve the greatness in my life sometimes, but then I look around and see kids with new cars and phones and clothes and think ‘why the hell do they deserve that shit?’
Does he know my future? What's in store for me? How far I get? If I succeed?

Do you think he will be proud of me? Do you think he is disappointed?

// Originally written October 24th, 2015 //

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Not Again

I wrote this when I was hurt... and when I had lost, yet another, friend. What I know is this: I know close to nothing. For everything I thought I knew, was a lie. I thought we would be friends forever. I thought that we could always work through anything and everything. I thought that opening myself up this time would be different. That everything would be different. But it wasn’t. Nothing was different and that’s what makes everything so difficult. I thought I was different. I thought that I had changed, but I was wrong. Once again, I fell under the wing of someone who changed me and used me to their needs and then ambushed me. They have made me feel like I am nothing like I am not worthy of life itself. That I could not possibly go further without such pain, such anger. Oh, how I am rageful. Oh, how I am hurt. I am determined not to let it bother me in such ways as last time. I know now that I shall not crawl back and beg for their friendship for they are not wort
Read more

My First Post

Hi, my name is Abygail. I've wanted to start a blog for awhile now, I was just too scared and didn't have enough time to before. I recently had surgery on my foot so I decided now would be a great time to start such a thing. I don't know what I want to achieve through this, but I'm hoping to get something out of it. I also hope I stick with it and post more than a couple times.  I used to have a real passion for writing, but I've somehow lost it along the way throughout my incredibly busy life. (P.S. It may not be that busy.) What do people normally write about on their blogs? I guess it depends on what type of blog they have. What type of blog am I going to have? Probably a messy one. My goal is to just go for it and blog about my life. My struggles and heartaches, the positives and negatives, ups and downs, and everything in between. Until next time, Be kind, stay true to yourself, and remember where you came from. 💕
Read more